Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Geek Rant Topic 04: To Most Furries

Previously on When All Else Fails: The 14 chastised the geek community for putting down Furries.

And now....

When all Else Fails, you call Mousa the 14, that one ranting geek.

I had a lot to say about how geeks are all hating on furries. But now, I'm turning this car around. It's time I complain to the furries. Because you guys, furries, you give geeks so much material to hate you. You're mostly relatively normal people, I know that, One of my good friends is a furry. You're all people too. I understand that. But I also understand that a vocal minority, and a moderate majority of you are all IDIOTS!

You perpetuate negative stereotypes that give people a reason to make fun of you. And I'm going to use the exact same list I used to scold the haters Just to prove my point:

1) They are easy to get a rise out of
2) They act like a repressed minority when they are at a minimum hobbyists, and at the most a subculture, but not a real one, but like how "gamers" and "Otakus" are subcultures.
3) Otherkin. 'Nuff said
4) You had a bad first experience with one and are projecting on them all because you are a deaf bigot.
5) There was furry porn and you assumed all of them were sexual deviants.
6) The furry porn thing part 2: They like animal-people, ergo, They are into bestiality, the sick perverts.

I'm going to go down this list bit by bit except number 6, for that doesn't apply to you guys.

1) Seriously, you guys are so sensitive it hurts. You're easier to get a rise out of than Keith Olberman and Glenn Beck combined. And as we all know, Olberman can complain about anything and Beck's a frikkin' maniac! So where does that leave you guys? You don't wanna know. The point is, you whine and complain and sob at the teensist criticism vaguely aimed in your direction and then you react, and the Trolls go wild! You're Not supposed to do that! You don't make a loud stink because someone makes fun of you, that only makes them look right about it. Which leads me to number

2) The whole "fursecution" thing. Get over yourselves, you're a particularly large hobby group that is fascinated with a certain aesthetic and interest in the anthropomorphizing of animals. You're not a lifestyle choice, you're hobbyists or a poor-man's subculture. You're the same as gamers, Anime fans, Trekkies, Star Wars Fans, all that stuff. Don't make yourselves bigger than you really are. You're just geeks like the rest of us, not an entire subspecies. You are not a lifestyle choice, which actually leads me to number

3) Otherkin. 'Nuff said.

Okay, for real, You guys are Nuts, there is nothing I can say that will change your perception of reality. Just keep it to yourselves.

4) I got nothing here, not everybody can be affable. All you decent furries just have to make good impressions and don't make jokes for the sake of screwing with people's heads. There are always bad eggs that will color people's opinions of you, nothing can be done here. Smart tip though: "Hi my name is X and I'm a furry" is not a good conversation opener. Only tell people if they ask about it. Remember, Baby steps.

5) Keep your exceptionally hot furry porn to yourself. Don't use it to mess with people, don't show it off often. It's bad enough people who hang out on the internet or enjoy porn are labeled as sexual deviants. You wanna make it worse by making the participants have traits that vaguely resemble their dog or pet canary? Look I hate intolerant morons as much as you do, but baby steps people.

And that's all I have to say to you furries. Leave the trolls alone and they'll leave you alone. Oh, and Otherkin? Seek help. Please. I beg of you.

-Good Bye, Good Luck, and Imagination Is Your Greatest Power.
Mousa The 14

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